Have you ever had that feeling that your life is out of control? Like you have no idea how you got to where you were and you’ve lost who you were? Ultimately that’s how I’ve been feeling lately, and that thought of not knowing who I was anymore was driving me deeper into blackness.
I had gone into the worst state of depression I’d been in in about 5 years when I found out it was going to be difficult for my husband and I to start a family, if not impossible. I knew I was depressed, but I didn’t realize just how badly.
I’ve spent the last two weeks digging myself out of that hole, and while I’m still battling these feelings of failure, letdown, and defeat, I’m working on bringing myself back to who I was and have seen an improvement.
I’ve been mostly staying off social media, posting here & there. I turned off all notifications, as I truthfully had become obsessed with checking things every few minutes. It was ruling my life & becoming an unhealthy habit to distract myself, from myself.
I’ve altered my unhealthy sleep patterns to a strict routine to help eliminate my horrible insomnia. I’ve lessened using my phone more than 5 minutes each night before bed or in the morning - eventually to not use at all within an hour of bed. I’ve focused on my activity level and getting up to do even routine things around the house in addition to getting out with the pups & Fern more. I’ve taken more time to pack my meals and snacks for work, so I don’t go to the store to get unhealthy things.
I’ll be implementing an exercise routine this coming week & will be continuing to alter my daily routine. Little changes slowly over time work far better for me than drastic changes all at once.
I appreciate all of your kind words, messages, & comments - I do read them all, but will be continuing to lack in responding still for a bit to continue to concentrate on getting better.
We always make an effort to get outside everyday, even if it is only for a few kilometres or running or a cpuple quick ski laps. I treasure these experiences no matter how brief they are. I live for these moments. You, me, and nature make the perfect trio 💕
How do you rate campgrounds and RV parks that you stay at? For Pete & Jordan, they give extra points to the ones that have easy access to the outdoors! Right now, they're staying at Tiger Run RV Resort in Breckenridge, CO - and the Continental Divide Trail/Colorado Trail is right across the street! Definitely extra points for Tiger Run ❄️🚍
1 1010 minutes ago
The lush forests showing off its true colors in the Olympic Peninsula. 🌲
I went for a walk in Glen Ure on Saturday, hoping to see an expanse of snowy wondrousness. There was more snow in my back garden! Still, it’s pretty special up there and rarely another soul to be seen. I always take the same photo from here. I’ve not found a better vantage point... #ricohgr#oban#scotspirit#scotland#tbt