The anchor both keeps you safe as well as it chains you, it holds you firm as well as it limits you. The anchor can be someone or something who you look back on or who you look forward to. The anchor... Is your home. #mebeinginsightful#fakewisdom#only19
A good friend of mine posted this video on facebook, and I realized how wrong Buddha was. (The 1 minute limit for videos on Instagram means this clip lacks the 15 last seconds of the video. But it says: "Replace your anger with love.") Clever rhetoric, though perhaps not reflecting reality.
There are many reasons people are angry, and most of it is stress related.
The reason people act out is to releive them of their own stress.
Lashing out makes the individual feel better (at the cost of another person feeling worse). This we know from studying humans and apes alike and checking for stress levels in the blood.
If you look at baboons, you'll see a high ranking male get annoyed about something. So he hits a lower ranking person who in turn gets stressed and releives that by hitting a female who in turn hits a baby. This happens within seconds. It's like a game of dominos. Sadly it's always the lowest ranking individual who ends up being unable to unleash.
I'm not saying this behaviour is in any way excusable. But it's what humans (and other apes) do.
What buddha did here is say: "Lol, I didn't get mad so here is your anger back." Which is not good either. If people don't act out they may direct all that anger inwards, which is about as close a definition to depression you'll get. It would have been more helpful to the guy if Buddha had simply listened and held a hand on the man's back.
So what is the solution to stress/anger? It certainly depends.
But Buddha's answer offers no solution. How do you really turn anger into love? Are they in any way reversible? "Don't be mad, love!" It's almost (though not quite) like sayin: If the sky is grey then make it blue. Because we don't always have control of the reason we're mad. There is only so much we can do about being yelled at by the boss, or being wrongfully accused by someone, etc.
Nevertheless we are responsible for our actions. We don't have to (and usually shouldn't) act out our frustrations, but if we don't, it may be at the expense of our own health.
So how do we turn that anger into love? What is the magic trick? Buddha didn't seem to know, or I suppose he would have told us. 😉